So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
