you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
