I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize
