I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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