This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
