i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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