You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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