I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
