Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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