they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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