check it out our google latitudes are spooning
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
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