We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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