Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize