"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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