let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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