9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
