i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
