If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
