He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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