school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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