he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
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