just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Randomize
