My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
