We won't sleep together?
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
ttyl tear gas
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
