just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
