I want to stick my p in your. b.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
