Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
