I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
