HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
