am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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