Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize