So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I think a kid would responsible me up
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
