Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
