The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize