No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
