she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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