Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
