Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
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