she was so not down for the gang bang
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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