So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
