For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
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