i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
