Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
NoShamevember. You game?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize
