my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
