yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize
