Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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