Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize