Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
