party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
