I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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