I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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